Gratefulness

Hard to believe its almost been over 3months since this little man joined our family, it has been QUITE an adjustment to the broken sleep, multiple outfits, hundreds of nappies and my brain never quite being able to switch off!

But as I shared with a friend early this week theres so much to be grateful for, in the days that seem to go on forever, or being stuck in peak hour traffic with a baby crying + toddler shouting at me, or trying to reason with a toddler to get dressed for 30mins and feeding at the same time Argh!!!

These precious moments won’t be forever and its just a reminder to be grateful for what you have, instead of comparing to others or popular people on social media. Everyones journey is different - financially, mentally, spiritually and physically. My body hasn’t bounced back as fast this time, I know it will eventually but my priority is making sure my boys are given love, attention and cared for. I hope in the busy-ness of life you can take moments out to be grateful and count your blessings too.

Have a lovely weekend xx

The little things

So just over a year ago I launched www.rebecca-smith.com.au, filmed my first video series to go out to all subscribed and then 24hrs later we happily discovered we were about to become a family of 4! Tiredness set in layered with a energetic toddler and a big PAUSE button was put on it all. Fast forward 12 months now we have a 3year old & 3month old boys so its pretty crazy at the moment business is still on pause but wouldn't change a thing. Even in this new season of four I'm enjoying the little things even more, trying to be more present around all the distractions of technology & life. It's not easy, deleting Facebook off my phone has helped quite a bit but I don't want my son to always associate me being on my phone. But getting on the floor playing hours of lego or Hot Wheels cars those moments I know in the future will make the difference.  Good friend of ours put it like this "if your on your phone  in the presence of others your making other people who aren't even in the room more of a priority than the people who are" Gosh did that hit home as a Mummy! Please know I'm not perfect in this area but its definitely something I need to work on.... So what little things could you be missing? 

Have a great week xx

Postpartum Reality

So when swimming lessons came to an end last year being 8months pregnant I was sad but secretly happy because no one would have to see my post baby body anytime soon... BUT we had a make up class during the week and I had to take some deep breaths pull on my swimmers and jump back in the pool. This is a body that's 9weeks post having baby No2, having another csection, my tummy isn't super flat, still very soft, I'm still carrying an extra 6kgs & got stretch marks this pregnancy. I can't fit into all of my pre baby clothes, and have to really consider my clothes shopping atm, so I'm comfortable but also feeding friendly. When I was still in hospital recovering a nurse in hospital reminded me "It took you 9months to make that baby, and for your tummy muscles to stretch out that much so don't be too harsh on your body" Some bodies don't (some do) bounce back straight away and it's totally ok you grew a human and that is such a miracle in itself ☝️There's so much pressure to get your pre baby body back so thought I'd share what it can be like so people can be proud of their post partum bodies instead !! Even though it took confidence on my end to jump in the pool again (and post this picture eek!) the smile on my sons face during the lesson, while he showed me new things was so worth it! 

Enjoy your week xx

Swimming Lesson + 9 weeks postpartum

Why compare?

Feet up after doing the 1000 steps on this humid day in Melbourne (It was actually really cool & refreshing, softly raining and a lot nicer then our humid house) …was it hard? HELL YES…. I stopped heaps of times, paced myself as I didn’t need to rush, hubby was close by if I needed him and had plenty of water…..  I felt compared to last pregnancy it was so much harder but then I started comparing my 2 pregnancies and they are nothing alike

Here are a couple of differences of my 2 pregnancies

Didn’t work out (apart from 1000 steps handful of times trying to bring on labour) & listened to all the junk food cravings VS

PT twice a week, running after a active toddler, some junk food but watching what I eat

At 41 weeks pregnant I’d just hit 15kgs VS

Currently 34.5 weeks pregnant & just clocked over 15kgs YIKES!

The biggest obvious one is last pregnancy I worked full time up to 37 weeks pregnant, and this year I’m not working in corporate but Full Time Mummy /cook/ shopper /cleaner /washer /planner/running a biz etc. YES my son is in Day Care 2 days but I volunteer on one of those days and the other I cram a lot of the “running a house with a toddler and busy husband” tasks into.

We know we shouldn’t compare but we do… all the time… I kind of know what its like to have a newborn but not a newborn and a toddler and its freaking me out, I think some Mummy’s have it easier than me and others have it heaps harder but its our own journey and no matter what our circumstances are being supportive to where ever they are is the best you can do.

Hope your all enjoying a well deserved break over the holidays xx

1000 Steps in Dandenongs

Who do you turn to?

IF we look at our Facebook profile page we’ve probably all got hundreds of “friends” but you and I both know there is only a small handful who actually are our closest friends, who you have cried to, vented to and know the real you.

We are surrounded by so many people in our life that can influence us, and sometimes not for the better. Take work for example I’ve worked for some incredible male & female bosses. There is only 2 that I would go back and work for (not that I’m returning to corporate life) but because who they were in life, their family values and the fact they were the same person at work and home life. In short they were amazing leaders and brought out the best in me.

In my personal life, more recently when I became a Mummy the people who I thought I would be turning to changed very quickly. I’ve touched on it before but I experienced some level of PND, not straight away it came later for me. I had some people around me who 1. Said there was no such thing as PND and I was just sleep deprived 2. Didn’t understand it or know what to do 3. I put on a front, so only my husband saw the melt downs and tears because I was trying to keep up with the other Mummy’s whilst holding it all together.

The people who helped me through it all and I felt I could be brutally honest with was a small group of people & a Mummy’s Group (nearly an hour away in peak traffic!). All who had been on the same or similar path as me and gave me tips along the way. Some I’d known for years’ others started as acquaintances then quickly became role models for me. I will always be thankful for being able to pick up the phone and have hour long convos xx

Now my little boy is approaching 3 and my group of women who I can turn to is still small & selective. I feel comfortable if I burst into tears suddenly for no reason (only last week!)  they get it.  Make sure you have you have your crew/tribe/girls/ladies/people who you can always turn to and in return they help you get through whatever life throws at you, we aren’t here to do life alone its better together!

Have a lovely weekend xx

Losing to a Toddler

See this beautiful angelic face?

If the camera had panned up to mine you would of seen look of deflated + big puffy red eyes from crying.

Losing a battle to a toddler when your tired/pregnant can be such a draining thing… you start off polite, warnings, sometimes pleading or bribery (no judgement please)......then you SNAP and before you know it both of you are crying (hormones DEF inflate the tears).

Today’s mornings post tantrum episode resulted in a missed swimming lesson, even tho the car was packed, all we had to do was get dressed and leave…. (45 minutes later of trying to dress a toddler I snapped) Then a "last resort" call to my husband which I’m sure wasn’t even audible through all the blubbering tears.

This particular photo was after a BIG morning of tantrums and once we got home he literally zonked out on the couch from exhaustion…. seems exhausting to throw tantrums?  but let me assure you as a mummy/parent trying to keep your cool in public carry on with whatever task your trying to accomplish or well mannered conversation with sales assistant, whilst handling your tantrum-throwing-toddler is just as exhausting.

So I let this beautiful angelic face sleep off his tantrums as he needed it

So did I

Once my tears dried I took some deep breaths, trying not to label his actions as a stage “terrible twos” or “three-nager” taking each day is it comes. It can be hard but I love this little angelic face more than anything + its all part of the fun of being a parent :)

Have a lovely week 

xx

Sleeping off his tantrums

Travelling + Toddlers

Currently we are nearly halfway through our family holiday, yes I said “family” which means hubby, myself and our toddler aka Master 2.5yrs. Two-week road trip around Tasmania, spending a couple of days in each stop so we can soak up all the beautiful scenery, heritage and towns along the way.

Are we enjoying ourselves even tho we can’t sit and look at the ocean until the sun sets or read a book for the arvo or have a spontaneous nap? The answer is still “YES” this time we’ve had together as a little family of 3 has had so many magic moments, moments that are priceless. So many #heartexplosion moments, observing my boys exploring together and listening to funny little things that come out of toddlers mouths.

My husband and I love to travel, and decided early on that we would continue to do so even with children. None of this putting off until either the kids are older/or moved out model.

As a result of this Master 2.5yrs has already been overseas twice, interstate and now on a boat cruise. Has it been testing at times with time zones, jet lag and trying to maintain toddler sleeping routines ABSOLUTELY, but has it been worth it? TOTALLY.

Having a little toddler with you whilst travelling just ADDS to the experience, a little more organisation to each day + sometimes more wine is required for the parents :)

So don’t put off your travel plans until later it can still be relaxing enjoyable all around toddler routines and tantrums!

Enjoy your week

xx

Family Holiday Time

What helps you smile?

Coming off “R U OK” day last week,  so many people shared the times they haven’t actually been ok…been REAL enough to admit it, make others aware and ask for help. The asking for “HELP” is sometimes the hardest part because generally speaking;

1. You don’t want to burden others or be judged.

2. You actually can’t define what someone can do to help you and all you know is your not managing and its overwhelming.

I’ve personally been in this boat, a few times… throughout my corporate career & when my son was about 9months old. My VERY supportive husband kept asking me what he could do to help/fix me and I just couldn’t give him specifics…… But over time 1 of the things I learnt that helped was getting my smile back and how having a LAUGH helped. Didn’t FIX everything, but it helped me get through it all a bit easier.

Recently with all the crazy pregnant hormones flying through my body I felt in myself I hadn’t had a good laugh in awhile….then in the space of 1 week I had dinner with some friends, laughed so hard I cried all my mascara off & saw 2 very funny movies “Bad Moms” & “Bridget Jones Baby” just hilarious, just what I needed. Hormones are still flying around but I’ve got my smile back :)

So try and find something that helps you handle things a bit easier, whether its asking for help, having some time out, a good cry or laugh, do more of what makes you SMILE!

Have a lovely weekend

xx

Laughter is truly the best medicine :)

What a year its been.....

So sometimes Facebook brings up some memories that make you cringe, question how you ever thought that was an ok outfit to wear out, or today makes you really feel so humble & grateful.

Today Facebook reminded me of what I was doing a year ago, sitting in the Infinity Pool looking over city-skyline 57 levels above at Marina Bay Sands in Singapore. My first ever time to Singapore, my second overseas trip alone without my boys, such a great time new friendships were formed so many fun memories & hangovers created…

But what really stood out to me was how much has happened in the last 12months since this photo. New jobs, new business ventures, new friendships, our first baby free holiday overseas, engagements, weddings, new babies and beautiful souls passing away.

With all of these things happening in what seemed a short time made me realise what incredible people I have around me. To go through all of these moments together, the laughter the joy, tears & heartache. Such supportive people, to just be there when no words could be said, help us take big steps of faith or ground us when it all got too much.

I hope when you look back on your last 12months, you not only feel proud of all that you achieved but also grateful for the people you have along the journey and just as excited as I am about what the next 12months could hold.

Hope you enjoyed your weekend

xx

                            Infinity Pool ~ Marina Bay Sands, Singapore

#struggles

Everyone has their own capacity, limit of what they can deal with and depending on which season of life they are in or energy levels is how they can manage.

Today - household shopping was done by 9:15am, two catch ups with beautiful ladies, a couple of errands, dishes, washing done, dinner in the works and of course caught up on latest episode of Bachie. I had energy, very blessed to have good pregnancies and some days I’m super energetic…

BUT highly likely I’ll be in bed by 7pm and let’s be REAL I have a lot of days that go a little something like this….

Snuggles on the couch watching Saxon’s fave shows in our jarmies & fluffy dressing gowns, we go at our pace, both have naps, house is a COMPLETE disaster. As I struggle with a big dose of exhaustion. Then I sms hubby “when are you coming home so I can prep dinner” which on these days is code for “how long do I have to get dressed and shower before hubby is home”.

There is a season ahead of me (newborn & toddler) that’s going to stretch me again, and knowing how much sleep deprivation can knock me about I’m probably going to have more “snuggles on the couch days”. But be ok to say “I’m struggling” or “can you please give me a hand”  or " I don’t know how to do this". We aren't here to do life on our own. 

Be kind to yourself, having struggles is all part of it, surround yourself with people who can help or be an ear. Its going to help the journey through the dips a little easier to deal with, most importantly be kind to others you don’t know what their capacity is.

Have a lovely weekend

xx

Time to Flourish

My husband and I are big goal setters, like every year we have big, huge goals to strive for and work hard all year round to tick off…. 

We’ve achieved a lot of our goals, and this year when it came to goal setting, we didn’t have a list a mile long. It was simple, some things still we needed to work towards but we gave ourselves flexibility if they didn’t go to plan which we’ve discovered is a wise move.

Its given us more freedom to actually enjoy what we have presently and be in the moment more. Looking back on the last 12 months we’ve still had a BIG year and lots of goals ticked off without really putting to much pressure on ourselves.

I’ve discovered a lot of people don’t do any goals, and just go through the motions each and everyday. They look forward to Friday every week and then dread Sunday evening cause the week is about to begin again.

Its important to have goals or have things to tick off along the way, even if it’s a small list, gives you a sense of achievement along the way, more meaning and also means your challenging yourself. We aren’t here to go through the motions everyday and not get ahead in life…

Stop saying "when the kids are older", "one day I’ll start that",  "I’ll eventually get around to it", or I'm just too busy to pursue my passions" ….. take a little step, buy a notebook and start to dream again because that’s when exciting things start to happen

Have a lovely weekend

xx

Being Real

Today I’m going to be super real ….The last few weeks at our household has been super… tough. Our son & I have been sick, then I had a bad cough that was keeping me (& hubby) up all night now turned into bruised ribs all combined with hubby putting in some big hours in the office and you probably noticed no blog went up last week whoops! 

After catching up with my close girlfriends a topic came up about being real, and the persona people portray on social media vs real life and it had me thinking….

What I do isn’t for everyone… and that’s why I like helping women think about what THEIR ideal life looks like and how to work towards that, to thrive and not to feel so stuck!  

Personally I love working from home, can duck into my office a lot of the time in my jarmies, answer questions/emails, place orders, brainstorm during nap time then play with my son, we go and have a playdate together or watch Fireman Sam for the 100th time. Also I can catch a lot of the online purchases before my husband gets home ;)

At the same time my house can 90% of the time looks like a cyclone has whipped thru it, sometimes I just have to leave it until my hubby is home to give me hand or I quickly do it while negotiating with my son to eat his dinner.

But when you love what you do in all areas of your life, balancing it all becomes easier to deal with. It doesn’t mean that your life is perfect, or easy, it just means that you feel better knowing that you’ve chosen each part of it with intention.

Have a lovely weekend

xx

What are you deciding?

We create what we expect. The real battle takes place between your ears, in your mind. The mind is incredibly powerful. Never under estimate the power of your mind to create your reality. For better or for worse. It has the power to make you sick, to heal you, to make you more productive, happy and successful. It also has the power to make you frustrated, sad and fearful. Be the exception. Seize the power of your mind.

When you are negative your serotonin levels go down, causes you to feel sad and low, but if you wake up positive, ready to attack the day, grateful and abundant heart endorphins are released making you feel happy

I have 2 people in my life who have similar home lifes, juggling the same things however one person no matter what keeps focusing on what she has to be grateful for, is open to trying new things or ways of doing things, yes she has tough days but doesn’t constantly complain about them – whereas the other person that’s all they do, complain about how hard it is for them and tell me I would never be able to know the extent of what they battle. You can guess which one I talk to almost daily, spend time with and inspired by???

So tomorrow when you wake up, what kind of day are you going to have?  You get to decide so what are you going to choose?

Have a lovely weekend

xx

How long until Spring??

So, I don’t know about you but I’m not really a Winter type of person….if I just look back on my 3 holiday destinations earlier this year Noosa, Bali & Gold Coast it really does confirm I’m a sun and tropical kinda girl. I’ve loved travelling to the snow for the weekend, being in London & Paris while snow flakes are falling but actually going through winter here in Melbourne that’s a whole other story. Speaking to other people I’m not the only one whose ready to skip Winter and go somewhere more warmer. I know its only for a season then before you know it, Spring will be here and more importantly sunshine will be back. Much like the newborn phase where your waking every couple hours and you would give anything to sleep more than 4 hours then boom you have a toddler! So i'l keep reminding myself "its only temporary" advice I got from an amazing Mumma of 2 who was also juggling multiple business's at one stage (yes B your a superwoman) - then I’m going to keep the heater turned up high (which is badly drying out my hair), have half my house looking like a Laundromat, live in my puffy jacket, gumboots and start counting down the days until Spring is here and of course start working on our next tropical family holiday destination for the second half of the year :)

Have a lovely weekend

xx

Time to give up being perfect

Today’s blog is for all the perfectionists, you know who you are, always over thinking, hesitate about doing things unless you will deliver to an exceptional sometimes unrealistic level. You always have to be absolute perfect otherwise there’s no way you tell anyone otherwise. Such unnecessary pressure! Don’t get me wrong I like things to be right, studying ballet as a little girl its very much about perfecting movements to make it look so effortless and graceful. Also throw in all the expectations and judgment when you become a Mummy!  I know people who haven’t pursued a business because they couldn’t get it looking perfect. But if they stopped trying to please everyone and putting crazy expectations on themselves they would actually be pretty amazing!

You, yourself do not have to be perfect to be successful in life or business, just start and keep going no matter what, block out the negativity (who cares what other people think!) and be sure to get advice from the right people, actually that’s a whole other blog post :)

People crave to see other normal people being successful!

So use today, the start of the new financial year to start and don’t stop

Have a lovely weekend

xx

Clarity is to declutter

So earlier this week what started as tidying up the office, turned into a massive declutter and about 8 bags later of "stuff" I no longer needed, suddenly I was feeling lighter and thinking clearer.

In my ebook I share how I know a couple who have a double garage and they can barely fit one car in the garage, and I constantly hear how its on the list to clean it, or downsize the stuff next hard rubbish day – but honestly they would need a good couple of weeks to go through everything before even knowing what to throw away.

For a healthy mind, body and soul, you have to determine what roles that clutter plays in your life. People usually hang on to material belongings for security and comfort, but sometimes letting go of the emotional baggage that comes with all those material things will allow people to enjoy more quality of life.

As you declutter your home, not only do you get to clean up and create more space, you also clear your mind of all the stress that comes with it. 

If you feel like you need to do some decluttering I have a couple of check lists to help you get started in my free ebook 3 TIPS TO FREE UP MORE TIME

"Clarity is to declutter, clarity is to put things where they belong and remove things getting in the way" 

Have a lovely weekend

xx

The beauty of boundaries

So its been one of those weeks, the housework has piled up because we lost a couple of days over the long weekend, 2 dinners were complete flops and this weather makes you want to cuddle under a blanket all day…..

The old me during my corporate days would have pushed through, ignored my body’s signals it was fading, wouldn’t have asked for help and definitely wouldn’t have called in sick. Earlier this week I could tell my energy levels were fading and rather than being fuelled by coffee, pushing through, proving to the world I’m a superwoman and potentially either get sick or fall into a heap I slowed right down. A few years ago I read a powerful book on Boundaries, and putting them in all areas of your life, because if you don’t, life and people will take take take. So I drew a line in the sand walked past the piles of washing yesterday and took myself off to the ballet, I needed to refuel and switch off. For me I have a few key things that recharge me going to the ballet, mani & pedi, a bubble bath, a nap just to name a few. I’ve noticed that if you try and do this at home you quickly attack the washing and before you know it you’ve spring cleaned the house. Exhaustion kicks in, and a grumpy snappy version of you appears. Personally I’d much prefer to be a healthier happy version of myself to my son and husband then have a sparkling clean house and make out everything is amazing that doesn’t impress me at all! So after the ballet yesterday I grabbed a delicious hot drink, and enjoyed my quick stroll back to the car (as the grey clouds formed) feeling recharged and happy in my heart.

Rest more, have boundaries and be sure to nourish your body so you can be the best version of you!

Happy a lovely weekend

xx

Why are you trying to do it all?

Tuesday of this this week I opened the front door, took a deep breathe in and smiled my house was smelling devine (essential oil Elevate bubbling out of my diffuser) and was sparkling clean. Our cleaner had just been and always, she had done an amazing job and confirms we made the right decision to hire her earlier this year. Now that I'm working from home people have questioned why we have a cleaner? with comments like "surely you could do it?"  "isn't it a waste of money if your home?" "aren't you a bit lazy not to do it?" .... 

Society keeps pressuring us to do it all, be more productive, saying yes more, taking on more than you can, essentially putting others and things in front of ourselves but there are consequences of doing that for a long period of time not just physically but mentally.

I see it all the time, people on the surface look like they have it all together, posting nothing but happy snaps, go out of their way to help people. But behind closed doors, falling into a heap putting silly pressure on themselves to achieve things and basically  1. not asking for help 2. refusing to let people help them out. It just baffles me because theres no award for doing it all ?   I respect people more who know where to draw the line and ask for help. 

In my ebook one of my tips is Outsourcing and even I was apprehensive about including it due to peoples opinons but we need to see it as a positive thing rather than being weak and getting others to help us. If your feeling overwhelmed feel like your doing a million things, stop and ask yourself why are you trying to do it all ? make a change, ask for help, stop trying to be the COE (Chief of Everything).

Your time is precious

Do what you do best outsource the rest

Have a lovely weekend xx

It Is What It Is

Today's blog is coming to you a little later than normal, because I couldn't decide on which topic until coming away from a phone call & lunch with my beautiful friends. I had a few ideas bubbling away but I'm mindful of being really authentic everytime I blog so it has to feel right before I start typing. At lunch we were sharing all things that life is throwing us at the moment, sharing the giggles along with giving the staff some entertainment cause we were being competitive with our lunches ... There is one saying that she always said, and has for all the years I've known her (10+years). When ever I hear someone else use it I'm like thats what Alikat always says... and I'm now using it more and more these days as I'm embracing a path that is a little different but there is nowhere else I'd rather be. Life is always going to throw you curve balls, stretch you, challenge you, really question whether your doing the right thing. Sometimes your superwoman, juggling a million things, then other times falling in a heap. If you come back to what's really important, the basics, in yoga they call it "back to self or back to your mat" you will give up the emotion and let go of things. Sometimes faster than other times. You realize what you should be giving your energy and emotions too like your loved ones, spouse, family and friends. You will without realising start to let go of things and friendships that are too negative and don't nourish your soul. Trust me I'm not perfect, there have been many heaps, tears, tantrums and really questioning why is this happening to me??  

But in those moments catching myself taking a deep breathe and saying 

 "It is what it is" 

Have a beautiful weekend xx

Ps my roasted pumpkin soup was the better choice :)

Doing More of What You Love

By the time you read this il be probably boarding for my flight (yes I'm heading away again) to warmer weather for the weekend only this time it's for business. I absolutely love flying, I know some people can't stand it. When I was younger I'd only flown a couple of times before being a flight attendant and even then sometimes doing up to 30 flights a week I never got over it. It actually gave me the travel bug and now not a year goes by without multiple interstate & international trips.  Even if it's cheaper to get to a destination by car, train or bus is much rather fly.  It's one of my happy places, for some people it's yoga, going for a walk along the beach, a freshly brewed cup of coffee, a hot bath, glass of wine or even reading. I'm very grateful we are able to travel as much as we do and I can stare out the plane window watching take off and landing. What's one of your happy places? I hope you get to experience it as much as I do with mine & enjoy every minute of it :)

Have a great weekend xx